Pendragons Princess

I wish I had a dime for every time that was asked of me, “Do you have any children? Do you want any children? Why don’t you want any children?” I cannot see how my not having kids would affect your life. Now, I can see where having a dozen kids would affect your life, especially if I was making babies just to get that monthly welfare check from the government. But as it is, my husband and I do not have nor want kids.

Instead of countering the questions asked with “We just do not want any kids”, I now prefer to ask, “Why do you want children?” Of course, this could provoke any number of responses from “I love children” to “Everyone has children.” That first one, “I love children”, is not really a good argument - Jeffrey Dahmer loved children, most pedophiles love children - their company, and especially touching children. As for ‘love’, hey, I love money - but should I go out and rob the nearest Wells Fargo bank? I think not. It is too easy to see where the “I love children” argument goes - nowhere.

The second one - “Everyone has children” - is funny but does not go without some criticism. There are some married couples, who, despite the fact they may be unable to reproduce, still have a meaningful relationship with each other. The couples actually has time for each other since there are no kids to get in the way of the relationship. Most importantly, however, is that not everyone marries just to have kids, even though that piece of paper from the government certainly does legitimize such human behavior. Especially since I know of quite a few people who have had children and are unmarried with no intention of marrying for the benefit of their children.

“Children bring such joy to your life and love you unconditionally.” So, is this before the child actually starts causing you migraines, says “I hate you Mom!” when the child turns twelve years old, and has their first run-in with the law for selling meth to five year olds on a bet with another high school student? Come on now. Children are tremendously dependent little creature who suck away your time, energy, and resources, only to grow up to be some bum on skid row. That is not exactly my idea of joy and unconditional love. If you want unconditional love, get a dog already. As for the joy part, well, my joy is in dancing. Maybe you can try tatting.

“Your children will take care of you when you get old.” Don’t speak to soon- your child may be planning to stick you in a nursing home as soon as you turn fifty years old. Worse yet, your child may be keeping a close eye on your assets so that he or she can make off with them as soon as your back is turned. Oh yeah. That’s unconditional love.

“My child will grow up to find a cure for cancer!” Oh yeah. The child won’t progress much in education if you continuously drag him or her down. Not only that, but there is a miniscule chance your child will grow up to discover a cure for anything, especially if you harp on your child for not being social enough and wasting time at parties and getting blasted instead of staying at home and studying that biology text. Try not to tell yourself that your child will grow up to be the next Albert Einstein.

So, really, why do you want to have children?