Nov 05 2008
Some REAL Reasons to Marry - and it’s not to have children.
Since it is almost always assumed that people marry in order to legally reproduce, I thought I would share some real reasons to marry:
The man and woman actually love each other. Note that I said love. Yes, I know how close to 99% of the human race identifies love with sex. They don’t know to distinguish between the two. That’s why they have crotchfruit with impunity.
The man and woman have a real relationship. Yes, I know that a man and woman do not need to have a relationship in order to have crotchfruit. Then they wonder why their “relationship” failed.
The man and woman actually appreciate each other’s company and enjoy doing things and going places together. They do not spend their entire time thinking of how to get away from the other person.
While the above three reasons challenge age-old assumptions why people marry (back in the good old days, the real purpose was to transfer property legally to a man, since females were forbidden to own property, go to school, go out in public, vote, or drive), there is a reason for them: our society has changed with regards to male-female relationships. Sure, at one end of the spectrum you have the dime-a-dozen hookups for all they are worth, but at the other end, are the solid, monogamous relationships where the couple may or may not have kids. I believe that there are a few solid relationships that have kids in the mixture though I realize it can be hard to cultivate such a relationship when children are constantly getting in the way. Couples who do not have baby rabies are able to have time for each other. Moreover, they are not afraid of bucking the social status quo on marriage. Which brings to mind, the kind of weddings childfree people have.
Weddings are a major passage in everyone’s life who does marry and how they treat the wedding itself says a lot about them. Are they getting married for themselves, for each other, or for society? After speaking with a seventeen year old girl at work not too long ago who wanted to know what kind of wedding I had, she was quite surprised. No church, no big crowd, no oversized reception. No cost average of $32,000.00 where I lived back east in Connecticut, either. That cost does not include reception or wedding ring, either. What it did cost us was the license, blood test, and fee for the JP. That’s it. Yes, a cost that even a working college student can afford. 
However, people who get married just to make a statement to the world - something like Britney Spears - it is no wonder the marriage starts to crumble down the road.
Lots of childed people are unable to understand the type of bond that childfree married couples have. I get one too many comments about that, the most recent one from a grocery store clerk, who nonchalantly asked what I’m doing Halloween night. Since that’s my night off of work, I proudly mentioned that I would be at home with my husband. The look on the clerk’s face at the cash register was priceless: apparently he didn’t think that was so much fun.
Then there was the time when I was working nights during another job and my supervisor actually says to me “I bet it’s nice to get away from him for awhile.” My left eyebrow went up as I had responded, “But I miss him.”
Oh and I just love people who ask me if I want a baby or that kids are inevitable with marriage. Maybe they are to the person saying it, but to me, no, kids are not inevitable. That happened while I was working at Dillards (where else?)
The main point here is, some people actually marry for other reasons besides kids. If the couple really love each other and have kids, fine - it’s their lives. If the couple really love each other, do not want kids, place their spouse as the center of the life (God forbid), then that’s fine, too.
